Terry Bradshaw’s Up Against Plastic Surgery, Panic Attacks & More on The Bradshaw Bunch Premiere

Terry Bradshaw like you’ve never seen him before.

The Bradshaw Bunch kicked off tonight, and if the premiere was any indication of what’s to come on the hilarious docu-series, the E! show will almost certainly wind up being your pick for MVP this fall television season.

In the brand new back-to-back episodes, the Hall of Fame quarterback and acclaimed sports analyst introduced viewers to his 800-acre ranch—complete with hundreds of horses, cows and a donkey named Snoop Donk—along with his wife Tammy and three daughters, Rachel, Lacey and Erin.

It didn’t take long for the drama to unfold, even though at one point Terry declared, “This is not the Kardashians!”

He spelled out everything he was grappling with in a confessional alongside his 7-year-old granddaughter Zurie: “I got three girls, which means I have three problems. I gotta get Lacey, your mom, to move to Texas so we all can be together. I gotta help Rachel with her business because she’s starting over.”

“And my problem with Erin is, she had a little procedure and she hasn’t told me about it, quite honestly,” Terry added, referring to his youngest daughter’s boob job. “It’s driving me crazy!”